| last night went to sing k with old LNSS frds, got to bed at 8am, and woke up by a phone call at 11am... it was an unexpected phone call, i was first mad, then touched, and lastly annoyed. this moment, i just want to share my feeling with myself, or with whoever else who bother to read my blog... for the past 23 years of my life, i made decision solely based on what i liked, what i felt was the right thing to do, and what i wanted. and if it was a wrong decision, there was no one to blame but myself. i've always been like this, i haven't change in the past, and i am not planning to change in the near future. after all, why should one change his personality on purposely just to impress others? yeah, may be there is only 1% in me that is counted as good, and the remaining 99% are worthless shit, but hey, i only wanted a happy life, and if i have to bear 99% shit personality to be happy, fine. you are right, may be in times i am selfish and self-centered, but this is my way of life, and if everyone in the world objects it, all the people around me, all my frds abandon me for being what i am, so be it. for i believe people comes in all sizes and shapes, there is no benchmark for a person's personality. believe it or not, i treated all my past relationships very seriously, but when things didn't work out, when i thought there were no love anymore, what am i to do? drag on? hoping one day it will comes without knowing when this day will come? so what if bad words get spread around about me? so what if my image diminishes everytime i break apart from a relationship? i live by my way of life, let it be breaking up with the girl who treated me better than she treats herself, what goes around comes around, i only do things that i think are right. may be someday i will make up with her, who knows? to those who hate me, disgusted by me, criticise me, go ahead, i couldn't care less, for i don't think i have done anything wrong. there is no fairness in love, there is no equation for love... this is the first time i got so put off by a person... |